How’d You Do?
If you’re just joining us, in our last blog post I proposed 7 Things to Lose If You Want to Win. Win what? YOU! The REAL you that will emerge in a way you’ll feel compelled to shout out loud: I Am Free!
Here is a summary of the seven things to lose in order to win yourself:
- Lose the disciplined approach – live as you feel
- Lose the role you normally play – try something outside of your norm
- Lose the mask you don each morning – express your innermost feelings
- Lose the notion that you’re in control – offer your will to flow with a current larger than you
- Lose your adult-like tendencies – see the world and others with child-like eyes
- Lose caring what others think of you – don’t take anything personally
- Lose the constant questions – feel what you feel and act upon that
Once losing these seven, I suggested we would regain our power. Soooo, how’d you do?? Did you regain your power? Did you gain anything at all? Despite feeling naked in the most vulnerable sense of adult-nakedness (not cute, chubby toddler-nakedness)—I ended up feeling surprised by the Dynamic Duo that showed up: Confidence and Strength.
Here are some of my observations of how it felt to lose me. See how many of these same things you’ve experienced.
Practice Losing Yourself And See What You Gain
1. By losing the disciplined approach, I gained:
- the courage to be innovative and take risks
- creative inspiration I didn’t know I had
- my old out-of-the-box thinking returned
2. By losing the role I normally play, I gained:
- an awareness of limitless possibilities
- the needed push to stop hiding
- firsthand knowledge of what is meant by, “I’ve taught people how to treat me.”
3. By losing the mask I don each morning, I gained:
- an intimacy with self that wasn’t present before I allowed myself to be vulnerable
- practice at showing up as the genuine me, which gave me confidence to continue
- the insight that less is more
4. By losing the false notion that I’m in control, I gained:
- a daily practice of surrender
- seeing the glass as half-full as my primary default
- the knowing that I am safe
5. By losing my adult-like tendencies, I gained:
- a sense of awe and wonder
- a curiosity that had been lost
- a desire to see the good in others first
6. By losing the habit of caring what others think about me, I gained:
- a non-judgmental view of others
- silence between my ears; the internal monkey-chatter ceased
- the wholeness of being
7. By losing the constant questions, I gained:
- more energy to focus on the now
- experiencing inner clarity
- simplicity, the gift of seeing life as uncomplicated
Own Your Strength
With each item I practiced losing, I grew stronger, freer, and more confident. I felt genuine, comfortable in my own skin, naked or clothed. There was no trying to sell myself, no game to play, I simply showed up as me… Buyer Beware.
And what about the ‘buyer’? What are they to think? Well, by practicing #6, the answer is clearly: I don’t care. But, if I had to guess, I imagine when you show up as yourself, and you do so repeatedly, the person on the other end breathes an inward sigh of relief. Any anxiety is released, as they ease into the comfort of knowing that with you, ‘what-you-see-is-what-you-get.’ By allowing yourself to be seen in all of your glorious you-ness, hopefully those mirror neurons of theirs will kick in and they’ll follow suit. Before you know it, you’ll be sitting around a table with people who have all lost their masks as well!
Without my disciplined approach, without my mask, without all of it, I felt naked. Until I didn’t. I practiced until I no longer felt naked. It doesn’t stop here though—I will continue to practice with each new encounter of each new day. See, I will never master losing all of it. Why not? Because I am human, so I will forget. I am human, so I will allow life to distract me. I am human, so I will give in to fear.
With each practice of exposing more of myself, I honor that which created me, and made me enough, just the way I am.