Why Trust Is Important

Sneak Peek into the recently released book:  Love, Trust & Pixie Dust.

Excerpt from Chapter 3: It Is What It Is.

why trust is important

“My life has been filled with many misfortunes, most of which never happened.”  ~ Mark Twain

Why Trust Is Important

Why Should We Trust Life?

Cliches become cliches mostly because they speak the truth.  So whether you loathe or love the cliche It Is What It Is, there’s a whole lot of truth in it.  That said, why should we even bother trusting?

One of my dear friends decided to play Devil’s Advocate one day, and sent me an email asking, “Why should we trust life?”  I say Devil’s Advocate because he wasn’t asking the question expecting a response, but rather for me to consider how I’d respond to someone reading my blog or even to you sitting here now, holding this book and wondering, Yeah, why should I trust life?

There is a simple, one-word response to the question — and that word is:  Peace.  Being at peace in our everyday lives is the ultimate end goal and reason behind why we trust.  Trust unlocks the door to peace.  But there’s more….

The Crux of the Matter:  What IS Versus What IF

Peace is why we trust, yes, but there’s more.  First off, put yourself in the mindset of thinking of trusting life as a series of events.  The series starts with the awareness/acceptance of What IS, which in many cases is the same as letting go.  Essentially, What IS, is looking at a situation and NOT inserting layer upon layer of What IF:  “What IF I lose my job?  What IF he leaves me?   What IF I get sick?”  No, no, no.  What IS means being grounded in seeing the truth, in not inventing the stuff that makes our heads spin out of control.

Think:  whatever you are worrying about or holding on to (the What IF) and imagine yourself letting go of those What IFs and seeing What Truly IS.

Once you are aware and accept What IS, the enormous amount of energy you were giving to the worry — or the What IFs — now ends.  It has no power over you.  This is key, because before you are aware and accept What IS, your mind races with thoughts of worry and fear.  Thoughts of What IF often lead to the invention of entirely fictitious situations (which I, and Mark Twain might add, hardly ever end up happening).  These ungrounded thoughts are what take up so much unnecessary energy.  They often lead to more worry, more fear.  You become restless and irritable, you lose sleep.  The snowball effect is in full force at this point.  The “monkey-mind” is cranked up in high gear, jumping from one thought to another and another, not easily quieted.  I think it’s pretty safe to say we’ve all experienced monkey-mind to one degree or another.

Field of Pure Awareness

It is when we become aware, and accept What IS, that the monkey-mind quiets, and we can Be.  Once we are in a state of Being, we are able to observe moment by moment, from the highest field of all, Pure Awareness.

Now, if it has all made sense up to this point, but I just lost you with the Pure Awareness comment, hang tight.  I want to take it a step further and deeper.  Once you’re observing moment by moment, no longer in the worry-place and completely out of the monkey-mind chatter, whatever action you take will be in harmony with this field of Pure Awareness.  Therefore, whatever action you take will be for the highest good for all.  Remember the Sufi story of the warrior and his bride?  (from Chapter 2)

By trusting life, we accept What IS, quieting the conflict in the monkey-mind and freeing us to observe and then act from Pure Awareness, which will be for the highest good of all.  Operating for the highest good of all also takes us to the next level:  Life is not just about us at an individual level, but as living beings we are all connected in a very intimate way.  For that reason, operating for the highest good of all is something to strive for.

By trusting, we marry our free will with the Divine, knowing that we are taken care of.  We are not alone in our worries or our struggles.  We are never alone.

You are never alone.

why trust is important

I have attempted to explain in words what is a knowing within me.  I encourage you to add to these concepts, question them, mold them and make them yours, changing the verbiage to suit your taste.  In doing so, you will land on your Truth, something that resonates and works for you.

Take a moment to consider how you typically approach life.  Which side of the cattle guard do you tend to hang out on?  The What IF side or the What IS side?  Depending where you are on the spectrum will immediately tell you what your beliefs are about how trust works.  And by the way, this has nothing to do with religion.  You may be the most religious person out there, attending every mass and service offered, yet between each mass, each service — maybe even during each one — you’re worrying about all of the What IFs in your life.  Becoming aware and accepting What IS is a spiritual belief and practice that anyone can adopt, regardless of religious beliefs.

 

why should we trust life

If you enjoyed this excerpt and are interested in learning more about trusting life, please subscribe to receive your weekly dose of love and trust.  I’ll never spam you — only sending you posts I hope will inspire and ignite your heart.  Love, Leslie

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Amazon, recently released book and HOLIDAY GIFT PICK:  Love, Trust & Pixie Dust

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Good News for Suffering Guilt-a-holics

Guilt

What would you say if I told you that I found something GOOD that comes out of feeling guilty?  If you’re wired with a guilt meter that runs high, you’re going to want to read this.

What Is Your Guilt Meter Default?

On a low to high scale, where does your guilt meter hover?

  • low — in fact, you’re not really even sure what I’m talking about.  Guilt, what guilt?
  • medium — it’s more of a situational thing with you
  • high— you NEVER ask for help or favors.  When someone offers to assist you, your automatic, pre-programmed response is, “No, that’s okay,” or “No thank you, I’m fine,” despite knowing that you need it.

If you found yourself identifying with the last group, it may not have anything to do with guilt.  It could mean that you’re extremely independent and prefer doing things solo.  Which is great.  But if you fit the full description, including the last part of the sentence — not accepting someone’s help ”despite knowing that you need it,” well, your default setting on your guilt meter might just be set to high (or maybe you’re just stubborn that way).

Guilt is one of those things I lump together with worry;  there’s really no place for it.  No matter how you slice it, guilt really doesn’t do you much good.

And although worry does absolutely no good for you 99% of the time, there is that tiny, little 1%, where on occasion, worry will force us to get off our butts and do something about a problem.  And for that reason, I give worry its 1% credit.

So, when I heard Gary Zukav (who, by the way, I admire his work a lot), say that guilt serves no constructive purpose whatsoever, I remember thinking, Then why does guilt exist?  Really?… no purpose at all?  Surely there has to be a reason, even if it’s a tiny 1% reason.

If worry could be used as a tool to help us take action, then couldn’t guilt be used as a tool for something as well?

The Good of Guilt

What if, in every instance that we feel the familiar pang of guilt, we used it as a reminder tool?  Like an alarm clock.  What if, every time we experience the feeling of guilt, our internal alarm clock goes off and reminds us, “Hey!  Pay attention to this feeling.  This feeling is here to remind you to do better next time.”

A typical scenario might look like this: we make a choice, a bad choice, then afterward, we feel guilty, beating ourselves up over the gossip we just engaged in, the lie we told, the third helping of cake we ate in secret, the temper that we allowed to flare out of control.

But, what if in the exact moment we hid the evidence of the eaten cake, or lied about eating it, or whatever we chose to do, what if when we felt that pang of guilt , the very instant that we felt it hit our lower abdomen, we reminded ourselves NOT that we are a bad person, but that WE’LL DO BETTER NEXT TIME?

Yes, we choose to use guilt as a reminder to do better next time.

Now, I’m not suggesting you don’t hold yourself accountable for your actions — that’s a whole different topic.  You should, must, take accountability for the part you play in a situation, but once you feel the guilt, instead of using it as a weapon to beat yourself up with, use it as a reminder to do better next time you’re faced with the same situation.  Just as an alarm clock reminds you to wake up every morning, the feeling in your stomach can do the same.

Benefits of Using Guilt as a Reminder

  1. once your body becomes accustomed to your alarm clock going off every morning, it no longer needs it, except for the rare occasion of an early morning flight.  The same principle applies to the feeling of guilt;  it will become an automatic reminder to do better, eventually the tool will no longer be needed, except on the rare occasion.
  2. just as your alarm clock wakes you with no judgement, the practice of using guilt to remind yourself to do better, will gradually shift your actions.  There will be no reason to slip into your old habit of judging yourself.
  3. you’ll stop assigning negative labels to yourself

We all experience guilt from time to time, but it doesn’t need to have a life of its own.  It doesn’t need to torture or torment us.  Trust yourself — by choosing to change the way you think about guilt, you can use it to serve your better good.

Subscribe above to receive blog posts delivered directly to your inbox.  Don’t miss an opportunity to learn to Trust Yourself and Life.   Love, Leslie

Learning How to Trust — The Ultimate Guide

Access the Complete Trust Series from This Page

Thank you for joining me in this step-by-step guide to Learning How to Trust.

Below are titles and links to each of the seven posts in the Learning How to Trust series.  If you’re interested in learning how to trust, this guide is definitely for you.  While you’re reading through each post, please don’t hesitate to contact me at any time with questions, comments, concerns, anything.  This is what I do!  This is what I LOVE doing, sharing with others — how trust works… and ultimately, I want you to have the tools to bring more peace into your home, your life, your being.

Learning How to Trust Series, Complete Summary

Part 1:  “The First Step in Trusting. Can It Really Be That Simple?”  Click here for the full article.  

Part 2: “Why Don’t People Trust?”  Click here for the full article.

Part 3:  “Top 4 Beliefs For a Foundation in Trust”  Click here for the full article.

Part 4:  “How To Practice Trust as You Go About Your Day”  Click here for the full article.

Part 5:  “Who Is Really in Control?”  Click here for the full article.

Part 6:  “The Top 5 Reasons to Let Go of Control”  Click here for the full article. 

Part 7:  “Tell Me Again…Why Should I Trust?”  Click here for the full article.

 

how to trust

You Now Have the Key to Trust

It’s been a pleasure sharing this KEY information with you — information which has been life changing for me.

Please email me with questions or leave a comment below.  I’d love to connect with you!  leslie@trustlifetoday.com

As much as I’ve enjoyed sharing this guide with you, I must admit I’m eager to return to my typical writing style: story-telling, sharing insights into trust, love, peace, forgiveness, synchronicity…all of our favorite TLT topics!  :-)

Again, thank you for joining me on this journey of learning to trust.

In love and trust,
Leslie

 

 

Tell Me Again…Why Should I Trust?

Tell Me Again…Why Should I Trust?

(Part 7 of 7 in the Learning How to Trust Series)

Here we are, TLT Readers — the seventh and last part in our series, Learning How to Trust.  A lot of material has been covered.  Hopefully, the nuggets provided here have been 1) golden  :-)  and 2) small enough that you’ve been able to digest them and put them into practice all along the way.

In the previous post, “The Top 5 Reasons to Let Go of Control,” I added a word collage of the elements that have made an important appearance throughout this series.  In no particular order, they are:

Awareness of What Is        Trust      Letting Go      No Fear
Never Being Alone       A Power Higher Than You        Practice on Your Stuff
No Worries         Everything Happens For a Reason
Praying With No Attachment to the Outcome           Surrendering
Foundation/Belief System        Trust Begins Inside of You

Each of the six posts that have led up to today have either touched briefly or extensively on each.

Today, however, the focus is blown up and expanded to the bigger, overarching question of Why Should I Trust?

As I’ve said before, I can answer this is one sentence:

Because it brings me peace.

I believe we, as human beings, seek peace more than any other thing in the world.  More than love.  More than happiness.  It’s Peace.

I believe our end goal in learning how to trust is peace.

There’s another key element at play here, something I call the throughout goal.  This is a constant frame of mind that trust brings as you’re working through a circumstance, moving through to the end goal of peace.  And this throughout goal is:  Keeping fear at bay.

By trusting everything happens for a reason, you keep fear at bay.
By trusting you don’t have to understand why something has happened or how it will be resolved, you keep fear at bay.
By trusting there is a higher power, one who sees far more than you do, and that this higher power dwells within you, you keep fear at bay.
By trusting in this foundation you’ve established, you keep fear at bay.

Because I will tell you, once fear sets in, once fear’s claws take hold, it’s damn hard to loosen the grip.

This is why I believe the throughout goal of trusting is to keep fear at bay, not allowing it to take root and grow, infesting your life with anything but peace.  Master the throughout goal, and the end goal of peace is yours, yours, yours.

I believe trust is the natural antidote to fear.  I also believe trust unlocks the door to peace.  They work together brilliantly.

And remember where trust begins — Trust begins inside of you.

I encourage you to look inward.  Look inside yourself and believe that the amount you trust depends on how strong you are in knowing: I’VE GOT THIS!  I can handle this…whatever this may be.

As you feel the peace enter your being, tell yourself, “I am taken care of.  I am never alone.  There is a bigger plan that I am unaware of.  I trust.”

 

why should I trust

My son in the pool. The vision of peaceful trust.

 

why should I trust

Take a closer look…. Peaceful Trust.

[The above pictures inspired the following article, "Today I Feel Peace Like That."  If you're new to TLT and unfamiliar with this post, I encourage you to click here for an extra dose of peace; a true story of the morning I went into the hospital.]

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Now that you have completed this series, it’s time to practice.  Remember, trust is a daily practice, not something we master, check-the-box, and declare we are done.  No, it is a daily practice like anything worthwhile.

I hope you have seen and felt the life-changing elements within Learning How to Trust:  pieces like What If versus What Is, a trust foundation, letting go of control, and so much more.  Think about your family, friends, co-workers.  Can you think of someone who would benefit from even one of these messages?  If so, please share the love.

In love and trust,
Leslie

To be taken to the full series on Learning How to Trust contained in one post, click here.