Recovery is going very well. Lately I’ve started to feel as if I’m really making progress. Receiving the okay to drive last week was a nice milestone. Now, back behind the wheel, running the boys here and there, going to the grocery store, meeting friends for lunch, it all seems hard to believe that less than five short weeks ago I was lying in a hospital bed.
So you can imagine that it throws me off a little when I run into someone who I’m seeing for the first time in months and they say something like, “How did you find it?” or “So, I hear it was found during your first mammogram, wow, that’s really unlucky.”
Each time I hear such questions/statements, I’m reminded of something my friend Matt said in passing shortly after I received the diagnosis. He launched right into, “So, who are your doctors? Are you comfortable with who you’ve chosen? When is the surgery scheduled?” Then he paused, and said, “I’m sorry to be so matter-of-fact…I don’t mean to diminish what you’re going through by jumping right into the core of it, but I figure you’ve already pulled up anchor. I don’t want to keep you back there,” gesturing with his hands, “when you’re way over here.”
What an incredible gift my friend shared with me: meeting someone where they are. It’s a skill Matt modeled brilliantly, and one I’d like to emulate. I see it as a skill high on the compassion scale. It says, “I’m on board with you.”
I never told Matt how much those words meant to me, although there’s not a day that passes that I don’t think about them. Pulling up anchor. I believe it’s another way of saying, “It is what it is,” but with a slightly different twist. More like, “You’ve moved on, and now you’re here, and I‘m right beside you, here to support you.”
Hey Buddy, thank you. I probably should have told you earlier. Thank you not only for providing the example, but also for giving me a mental catch-phrase that I now use as a reminder when listening to others and what they’re going through.