Turn Fear & Worry Upside Down

A New Normal

Aug 132012
 
A New Normal

I keep waiting for my body to feel ‘normal’ again.  I think, because I’m a hopeful person, I keep hoping that my body will go back to feeling how it did pre-cancer, pre-surgeries. I’m just about done waiting…. Around 11 months ago my brilliant surgeons went in and removed all of my breast tissue, replacing the undesirable tissue with temporary implants, and eventually permanent implants. Yes, that’s 11 months for me to get used to a new body, a new normal.  Yet I still wait. I still can’t hold several yoga postures.  Or, if I manage to get into the Continue reading >>

 August 13, 2012  Posted by at 12:41 AM No Responses »

Being Wrong Ain’t Always Bad

Jan 112012
 
Being Wrong Ain't Always Bad

Doctors, Doctors, and More Doctors Between my older son and I, we have almost every ~ologist, as he calls them, that you can imagine. Endocrinologist, nephrologist, radiologist, neurologist, pediatric ophthalmologist, dermatologist, gynecologist, audiologist, and now, an oncologist.  Then there are the non-ologists: ENT, geneticist, breast surgeon, and a few others I’ve probably forgotten, but these are the regulars. Although I never dreamed our family would have the need for a pediatric endocrinologist (to monitor a completely non-functioning thyroid in my son), two nephrologists (kidney doctors), a geneticist (to tie this lovely mess together for me), or many of the other Continue reading >>

 January 11, 2012  Posted by at 12:02 AM No Responses »

They’re Just Breasts, Right? Wrong….

Jan 022012
 
They're Just Breasts, Right? Wrong....

A Landing Spot I recently mentioned to my mother how I keep finding crumbs on my chest.  She asked me, “On your chest?  Where did they go before?” “In my lap!” I told her. See, I have a much different body now than I did before.  One that collects crumbs, as if they were landing on a shelf, instead of making a direct descent to my lap! Boy, did we laugh at that one!  But it’s true.  My body has changed.  And along with the physical changes, came the emotional changes.  Those, I must admit, have not been as humorous.  Continue reading >>

 January 2, 2012  Posted by at 12:04 AM 1 Response »

Surviving Life

Dec 192011
 
Surviving Life

I’ve written about being a Sur-Thriver: Thriving after cancer, not only Surviving it. One of my favorite poets, Mark Nepo, also feels he thrived after cancer.  Today however, I’d like to share some of his words of wisdom on surviving.  Oh, the lessons Mr. Nepo teaches us on Surviving Life…. The Wisdom to Survive Nepo frames his short essay, “The Wisdom to Survive,” by offering a brief anecdote by Paula Poundstone: “My mom said she learned how to swim.  Someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.  That’s how she learned how to swim.  I Continue reading >>

 December 19, 2011  Posted by at 9:34 AM No Responses »

A Little Honey and Lemon

Dec 142011
 
A Little Honey and Lemon

On the drive home from my post op visit with the plastic surgeon, a girlfriend turned to me and said, “Now if that’s not turning lemons to lemonade!” While in the doctor’s office, she saw ALL.  You might think she got an eye-full of these beautifully reconstructed breasts.  Well, maybe.  But she also got to see the scars, old and new (eight incisions in total of varying lengths) and the bruising.  Oh, the bruising. As you see, I’m not sugar coating here.  I, in fact, still cringe slightly at the reflection in the mirror.  I was not quick to embrace Continue reading >>

 December 14, 2011  Posted by at 12:36 AM 2 Responses »
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