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45 Hopes, Dreams and Secrets

hopes and dreams

1. I hope to one day treat time as a friend and stop trying to beat it, trick it, morph it, or curse it.

2. I hope for a strong, steady, peaceful heartbeat until the end/beginning.

3. I hope to have more and more Forrest Gump in me with each passing day.

4. I hope to be filled with the happiness of a Pug and the sweet, good-natured-ness of a Lab.

5. I hope to allow my heart to swell, even when my mind wants it to constrict.

6. I hope to always have the desire to get up after I stumble.

7. I hope to be my own light.

8. I hope to recognize when others are the light and give them thanks.

9. I hope to find a feeling of comfort even in the uncomfortable.

10. I hope to see the rainbow before, during, and after the rain. Before, during and after the dawn. Before, during, and after the dark.

11. I hope as my body ages, my mind remains sharp.

12. I hope to declutter my life as I declutter our house.

13. I hope to learn how to feel an inward smile, even underneath whatever tears or pain lurk, even in my sleep.

14. I hope to realize my dreams.

15. I hope to never stop hoping. I believe hope is the opposite of fear, so this one is very important to me. 

hopes and dreams

16. I dream of leaping onto the back of a jaguar and riding nowhere. For hours.

17. I dream of wandering in a field of books growing from vines.

18. I dream of flying with weightless, iridescent wings with the softest yellow and pink hues.

19. I dream I am a bee, buzzing with one, singular rhythm with my hive.

20. I dream I inhabit the veins of an oak leaf, and can tap into the pulse of my roots.

21. I dream of walking the halls of my high school completely bald and accepted.

22. I dream of starring in my own movie, smiling as I sit in the theater as on-lookers laugh, cry, whoop and boo. 

23. I dream of bobbing in and out of a cloud.

24. I dream I am a lightning-bug flying outside the window of my 7-year old human self, blinking a message in morse code to that little girl. Dot, dash, dot, dot, dash, dash, dash, dot, dot, dot, dash, dot: LOVE.

25. I dream of watching the astonished faces of my loved ones as they tune-in to their unique super-power. Then, watching their faces fade to one of serene knowing…realizing they had known it all along.

26. I dream I am a sugar cube being placed on a child’s tongue, dissolving, and feeling the rush of joy. 

27. I dream of being mist in the Congo. Nothing more.

28. I dream I am feeling. Not that I am feeling something, like a verb “to feel,” but I AM feeling…as if feeling were a noun.

29. I dream I am a glob of green paint. Each time the painter dips his paintbrush in me and touches me to the canvas, I feel the thrill of knowing I am becoming.

30. I dream you are a blue glob of paint. You just joined. You invite purple. She invites black. He invites orange. Soon we are swirled around together, breathing in one another. With the smell of paint still filling my nostrils, I wake and wonder how racism still exists.   

hopes and dreams

31. I secretly believe our culture has hit a level of over-the-top that feels gross to me…in all of our excesses and indulgences.

32. I secretly have more OCD tendencies than I allow others to see.

33. I secretly have girl-crushes from time to time. 

34. As much as I love and adore my family, most of the time I secretly prefer to be alone with my dog.

35. I am secretly more afraid of success than failure.

36. I secretly knew the diagnosis would come back as breast cancer before the doctor officially delivered the news.

37. I secretly believe that if I’m not being productive, I am unworthy.

38. I secretly procrastinate by obsessively moving things around on my calendar. While I’m doing it I tell myself in the long-run I’m setting myself up to be more organized, therefore more productive. However, as I’m saying it, I know I’m just wasting time. 

39. I secretly feel more beautiful after breast cancer. Maybe even because of it.

40. I am secretly over-the-moon when I think of how fortunate I am to be my own best friend. Yet at the same time, I am confused how I allow that very same person to hijack my peace.

41. Although I do not enjoy being sick, I am secretly happy when I catch a cold because it gives me an excuse to rest.

42. Having a firm knowing that all of life’s answers are inside me, I secretly wonder if I will ever stop seeking.

43. I secretly believe that the only place heaven and hell exist are within me.

44. I secretly wish I were smarter.

45. I secretly wonder if nothing matters, or if everything does.

glass half full

Hopes, dreams, secrets—they all start within me. Yours all start within you. Today, on my 45th birthday, I wanted to share 45 of my hopes, dreams, and secrets with you. As I contemplated each one, I could feel myself growing—especially with the secrets—each secret made me squirm to admit out loud. So why do it? I believe it’s through our sharing that we are able to learn and grow. Grow more into who we were put on the Earth to be. Grow free. 

There is a whole community of people sharing, learning, and growing together on Love, Trust & Pixie Dust. Come grow with us. Click here and share ONE hope, dream, or secret with us. Or share MORE. Go deep, keep it light, it doesn’t matter, just come join in on the love, trust and pixie dust.



I realize today’s message was a little different from the norm here, but you never know, it might be just the thing someone in your circle of friends is meant to experience today, so please forward to a friend. Thank you!

Do You Want More Trust and Love In Your Life?

Years ago I wrote an article entitled, “Chinese Symbol for Crisis.”  If you’re unfamiliar with the Chinese symbol for crisis and what it stands for, its symbol combines two figures, two key elements:


I was reminded of these two elements, danger and opportunity, when I saw this picture:

trust and love

But I also saw something more, a third element.  Trust.

Trust on the part of the kitten.  And more importantly, trust on the part of the dog: Trusting himself  to know he will not harm the kitten.

Perhaps you’re thinking the kitten doesn’t know any better.  He’s just along for the ride and whatever happens will happen.  But I disagree.  See, I don’t believe it’s part of an animal’s nature to automatically trust.  Especially not trust the larger animal with the big teeth exposed!  It’s all part of a much bigger instinct called Survival.

Yet here, in this young kitten’s life, a bond has already formed.  He feels the warmth and gentleness of the good-natured canine he clings to.  What could be seen as a crisis, is not.  It’s simply trust.  And love, too.

Crisis = Danger + Opportunity

Trust = Love

Love = Trust

Trust and Love Go Hand-in-Hand

And even if an equal sign between trust and love isn’t 100% accurate, 100% of the time, trust and love go hand-in-hand.  That much I know for sure.

To what degree do you trust yourself?  Have you ever considered that before?  Or is trusting yourself typically something you think of as happening outside of yourself?  As in, I don’t trust him or I don’t trust her?  If you would like more love in your life, look at your trust, at your self-trust.  There is a very strong correlation there.

If you’re not quite sure what I’m talking about, but would like to get to a place of more love and more trust, come join us at the newly formed Facebook group: Love, Trust & Pixie Dust.  It’s only about two weeks running, and already we have formed quite a community of Pixie Dusters (almost 600!) sharing their hearts, what’s working, what’s not, and growing a community around loving and trusting ourselves more.  Won’t you join us?

Love, Leslie

Ignite Your Heart

The work we do in life can sometimes feel heavy.  Learning to trust, finding our truth, looking within—each are meant to help us feel more at peace—however, sometimes all of this spiritual work feels more like the piling on of ten soaking wet wool blankets.  Heavily, slowly, crushing.

There are days I long for the bliss of ignorance.  Not days, more like moments throughout the day.  But still, they exist.  Those moments when I think, Ah to be young, clueless, and unaware.  Riding my bike, skipping, talking non-stop as I walked alone in nature.  Talking with whom?  Who cares?  It didn’t matter.  No one.  Everyone.  God.

And that bounce in my step?  Where did it come from?  From the feeling of being light.  Unencumbered.  Unafraid.

I don’t bounce much anymore.  And I’m almost* perfectly fine with that.  There’s a time and a place for everything.  Then was the time for that, and now is the time for this.

*Almost perfectly fine…

Almost because I’d like to settle into a balance.  Something between the bounce and the soaking wet blankets.

Spirituality doesn’t have to feel heavy or over-serious or wet-wool-blanket-like.  For me, it just has to feel real, solid, meaningful.  Spirituality is living your life with a purpose that ignites your heart.

ignite your heart

Does your heart feel ignited?

Today, no matter if your heart feels ablaze with intense emotion or more like a buried, forgotten lump of coal never destined to find its flame, follow along and feel this:

  • snap your fingers together gently, only hearing the whoosh, brushing of a noise, not a hard crack.  That was the spark of your heart igniting.
  • narrow your eyes, squint a little as you glance within the left side of your chest, see a white dot surrounded by a soft, yellow halo
  • as you focus your eyes, sharpen your awareness as you see the soft, yellow halo begin to pulsate
  • slowly, very slowly, watch it grow
  • feel it grow
  • Feel
  • it
  • grow.
  • see the single flame grow larger
  • and now see the flame multiply
  • shift your seeing entirely over to feeling
  • feel your heart completely ablaze
  • alive, roaring with life, purpose, meaning
  • quickly, shift the fire to your throat!
  • expand the flames and ask yourself NOW:
  • “What have I been wanting to say, but have been holding inside?”
  • let it go
  • Let
  • it
  • go.
  • easy, now
  • let it go.

Now seal in your experience.

Grab your iPhone.  Yes, you read correctly.  You know it’s right beside you.  Go to your Clock app (standard on all iPhones).  Choose Stopwatch.  Tap Start, with closed eyes, take 10 deep breaths in and out as you seal in your inner-heart-throat experience.  For 10 breaths, go there, wherever there may be.  Close your eyes and begin.

Hello again.

Offer yourself love as a way of thanking yourself.  It’s simple, just say out loud, “I love you.”

Now wash and repeat.  Each time you begin to feel the heaviness that comes with Life, have this exercise handy.  Next time you may not shift from your heart to your throat, you may shift from your heart to your sore knee, or to the ringing in your left ear that’s been bothering you.  Go there and release.  Let. it. go.

Ignite Your Heart


P.S.  Ten breaths in and out this time took me 2 minutes, 21 seconds. Last time: 1:54.  I must have had more to let go.


If today’s message spoke to you, won’t you please share it on Facebook or forward to a friend?  You never know, it might be just the thing someone in your circle of friends is meant to experience today.  Thank you!

The Fastest Way to Banish Fear and Doubt

If you’re interested in learning how to banish fear and doubt, which includes abandoning your worries as well, don’t go away.  Today I’m sharing the first step—a step that is easier than you might think—it just takes some practice.

Have you ever noticed how we complicate things?  How we take something relatively benign and turn it into some web of complexity that only highly trained special agents could possibly untangle?

I have.  And truth be told, I still do a fair amount of it, depending on the topic.  Anything the least bit technical and my brain goes fuzzy.  Not too handy of a personality trait for someone who does most of her work on the computer/internet.

Technology and Leslie, not so much.  Trust and Leslie, now that’s something that works for me.  I get it.  And I want you to get it, too.

I didn’t always get trust, though.  I believe that’s why I suffered from insomnia for so many years.  I wasn’t able to stop my mind at night, spinning tall tales of What If this, and What If that?  What If I would’ve said this, oh, then I bet he would’ve said that.  (Sound familiar?)

My mind had fallen in love with What If scenarios, mainly because they fed it and allowed it to stay active, even when it wasn’t to my benefit.  What If scenarios had become a habit.  A habit that was extremely hard to break — until I realized that What Is is a much, much healthier place to live.

What Is banished What If.  But it took (and still takes) practice.

Trust rippled in water

And here we find our First Step to Trusting:

Becoming Aware of What Is

Making the shift from What If to being aware of What Is is a total and complete game changer.  It’s a means of setting yourself free.

(Disclaimer:  It’s a bit of a shallow example, but something most of us can relate to, either now or from past experience.)

Okay, let’s walk through this.  Let’s say there’s someone you feel a connection with and are attracted to.  (Let’s make him a him.)  You believe he also feels the connection and is attracted to you, too.  You’ve shared some special moments, some special conversations.  He’s away on business now, and says he’ll call.  Time passes and no call.

Which will you choose to believe?

  • Option #1:  He’s swamped with work.  That’s why I haven’t heard from him.  Hmm…I wonder.
  • Option #2:  I’m not in near proximity, so he’s forgotten all about me.  He must be one of those “Out of sight, out of mind” men.  He’s just into me when I’m around.
  • Option #3:  He has met someone else.

I could go on, but you get the idea.

What do each of these (and numerous other scenarios I could come up with) have in common?  They all reek of:

I must not be very important to him.  I must care about him more than he cares about me.  My heart is invested in this relationship way more than his heart.  And all of these thoughts could be preceded with “What If” and still read exactly the same.  All are in your mind, and nowhere else.  Think about it:  They exist Nowhere Else.  Your mind is the only place they live, and you put them there.

After saying each of these things to yourself, how do you feel?  Peaceful?  Loving?  Worried?  Fearful?

Chances are, not peaceful.  And not loving either.  I mean, isn’t peace why we trust to begin with?

inner peace

So….What Is?

What Is, is he said he would call and you haven’t received a call from him.  You have no idea why.  Period.

What if you choose to go about your daily activities with only that in mind, practicing What IsHe hasn’t called.  And right now I don’t know why.  The end.

You go to work.  You’re focused on projects.  You interact with others.  You enjoy dinner with a friend.  You live your life.  All the while, with the two bits of What Is in mind, no added story to go along with the unknown.

Later, you hear from him.  He tells you why he hasn’t called (dropped his phone in the toilet, ran out of battery, who knows), and at that point — this is the important partyou trust yourself enough to decide if his explanation is reasonable to you.  You trust yourself enough to know if you’d like to continue getting to know him further or not.  You trust yourself.

Yes.  You Trust Yourself first.

So, what’s simple about this?  Well, making the switch from What If to What Is, takes practice, but once you’re aware of it, that’s all it is:  daily practice.  And wouldn’t you agree that NOT approaching life with fear and worry, but rather living life in peace through trust, is worth the practice?  

  • Become aware of What Is
  • Dedicate yourself (your mind!) to actively practicing What Is
  • Remember where trust begins:  Trust Begins Inside of You

Are you eager to learn more?  Much of what was covered in this post (plus more!) is discussed on the podcast below, as I interview SWAT Team Leader and career police officer, Bob Seklecki.  If you haven’t tuned in to Love, Trust & Pixie Dust, the new radio show I’m honored to host, check it out!  Come learn how this simple first step can be applied to your life today!

why don't people trustDo you know someone who could benefit from learning how to trust?  Don’t be shy, please share.  You never know, this might be just the thing they’ve been searching for!

In love and trust,